Forgive yourself

In my blog “moving outside the tangle of fear-thinking” I referred to the following quote of Rumi:

“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”

This quote is so powerful and it inspired me to write another blog post.

The barriers are countless

When you start seeking for the barriers you will be surprised how many barriers you have built against love. Against happiness. Against joy. Against abundance. Against your own power. Against yourself.

The barriers are countless and they all have their own mechanism. However, they have something in common: They all leave you feeling unworthy, wrong and maybe even ashamed.

It requires a lot of consciousness to release the barriers

I found many barriers within myself that I have built against love, happiness, joy, abundance and upper most my own power. Of course I did not build them consciously. But it requires a lot of consciousness to find and release them.

Sometimes they are very subtle, sometimes they are right in the face. The more you turn your attention inward, the more you will understand the mechanisms of your behaviour. As a result you will identify the barriers more easily over time.

Becoming aware of the inner war

To be honest it made me sad to realise how much I act against myself. I for example observe myself causing a fight with my boyfriend just because I want to ruin the beautiful morning we have spent together. Or I notice this nasty voice in my head that puts me down after I have spoken up in a group of people and shared my feelings openly.

It makes me sad to witness this war within myself between the part of me that wants me to blossom and the part of me that is very destructive and wants me to be small.

The importance of forgiving yourself

Over the years I learned how important it is to forgive myself for all these destructive mechanisms I have established that leave me feeling stupid, small, ashamed, wrong, unworthy, dirty, …

After a fight with my boyfriend I therefore not only ask him for forgiveness. I also ask myself for forgiveness. And I noticed that this brings me calmness. It makes me softer. It raises my vibration releasing the feelings mentioned above.

The magic of ho’oponopono

To forgive myself these four simple sentences have proven to be very effective for me:

I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you.

They originate from Ho’oponopono, a ritual from Hawai that is practiced for forgiving. These four sentences are of course not the whole ritual but I find them itself already very powerful.

I usually repeat these sentences several times until a sense of calmness and relief comes up.

While I say these sentences I like to place my left hand on my chest, my right hand on my belly focusing on breathing in and out deeply.

It feels like giving myself a hug

This little ritual feels like giving myself a hug. Telling myself that everything is alright. That I am enough. Perfect as I am. A living breathing being worth of receiving love, happiness, joy and abundance. I forgive the destructive part of me as at its very base it just wants to protect myself.

This little ritual allows the energy to flow again and thereby weakens the barriers. Yes, they might still be there. They might still kick in. They might still leave me feeling wrong, unworthy and ashamed. But I learned that when I forgive myself these feelings do not stick around for long.

Just try it. I hope it will do its magic for you, too.

2 thoughts on “Forgive yourself

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